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Black History Month and the Pyramid We Inherited, Mental Health, Identity, and Self Image

My interest in Black History Month did not start from curiosity. It started from what I already knew to be true. Our curricular could not let us get out of school without learning about colonialism, missionaries and slavery.

For a long time, I understood descendants of slavery share real ties with Africans on the continent. Not symbolic ties. Blood ties. Cultural ties. Memory ties. Long before social media debates, they spoke of Africa as the motherland. They fought for a free Africa. Black communities in Harlem are said to have participated in the “Hands off Abyssinia” campaign and Ethiopia was never colonized. In recent years, they built systems to trace their origins on the contient and they seemed excited about what the results revealed. They seemed to be proud of having an idea about the exact part of the Africa their descendants came from. They shifted from calling themselves Black Americans to African Americans because, I presume, identity mattered more than location.

So the connection never felt accidental but last year, something unsettled me. I found myself online, sandwiched by African American women swearing that they could never be African. That the only African thing on them is just the melanin and nothing else. No emotional tie. No historical closeness. Africa, to them, felt distant, almost irrelevant. In fact, they added that our body shapes are different too because Africans are plump, large features and also intellectually poorer that the African Americans.

That moment forced a pause. I wondered if at all, they read what they wrote. If at all, they meant what they said. Their wording was not different from the very sentiments racist white people have when related with Black people. I could not believe what I was reading because to me, slavery did not erase their origin. It disrupted it. Distance did not cancel ancestry. It complicated it. Yet somewhere along the line, separation turned into belief. Africans became “other.” Blackness became political. Identity became shaped by where someone survived, not where they came from.

That is where the fracture starts. Not in skin. Not in blood but in perception.

From there, Blackness begins to sort itself. Who sounds closer to power? Who looks closer to acceptance? Who lives closer to opportunity? And slowly, a pyramid forms inside a people who already survived being placed at the bottom of someone else’s pyramid.

Black History Month often sits on pride, culture, and resistance. All matter. Yet one part stays quiet. The part about how Black people see themselves, and how those views grew inside systems built to rank human worth. For centuries, whiteness placed itself at the top of the social pyramid - by law, story, religion, science, and violence. The message stayed simple. White meant superior. Black meant less.


Over time, the harm did not stop at race lines. It moved inward. Descendants of enslaved Africans learned survival inside white systems. Some grew into belief systems where closeness to whiteness meant progress - even in the days of when slavery was legal, the House Negro was of a higher rank that took on the identity of their master. Accent, skin tone, class, passport, and education turned into status. Slowly, some began to feel higher than Africans on the continent.

Time evolved. Slavery was erased and Black people moved freely. The African who were left on the continent started moving to the western countries and the Africans who left the continent met another trap. Migration became proof of success. Distance from home began to sound like development. Some started to speak of those who stayed as backward, slow, or stuck.

Then inside the continent itself and by extension the Black community, another ranking formed. Lighter against darker. Same pyramid. New faces.

You see it in beauty before you see it in politics.

Natural hair gets labeled unprofessional. Relaxed hair gets called neat. Dark skin gets called aggressive. Bleached skin gets called soft. Full African features get mocked. European features get praised. Somewhere along the line, a cruel sentence started moving quietly through society. It is better to be a light skinned “ugly” woman than a dark skinned beautiful one.

This hierarchy injures self-concept. Self-image grows from comparison before it grows from truth. When value comes from standing above someone else, identity stays unstable. Pride turns into defense. Confidence turns into performance. Belonging turns into competition.

Mental health feels this first. People chase worth instead of living it. They fear looking ordinary. They hide roots. They feel shame for where they come from. They speak success without peace.

A mind raised inside ranking systems learns to measure itself all day. Am I better? Am I behind? Am I enough? None of these questions build safety inside a person.

The danger sits deeper with Black communities because history already attacked dignity. When oppression leaves the room, its furniture stays in the mind. Children absorb it early. They learn skin tone meaning. They learn hair texture meaning. They learn accent meaning.
They learn location meaning. Before they learn self-respect.

This shapes anxiety, comparison, burnout, and emotional isolation. A person feels pressure to prove value instead of experience life. Many grow successful and still feel unseen inside.

Black History Month should offer more than celebration. It should offer repair. And repair starts when Black people stop climbing imaginary ladders and start building grounded identity because a grounded identity asks different questions.

Who am I without ranking? What stories raised me? What pain shaped my people? What strength survived anyway? What does dignity look like without comparison?

Mental health grows where belonging grows. A person who feels rooted does not need superiority. A person who feels seen does not need distance. A person who feels whole does not need hierarchy.

February gives space to revisit Black history as emotional history, not only political history. It gives room to talk about how racism trained perception and I honor Bell Hooks for pointing it out in her "Rock My Soul" book. This month offers space to assess how colonial systems shaped self-image, and how healing asks for internal freedom, not only external progress.

This month at NABU Network, we focus on Black mental health through identity, childhood, culture, rest, and self-respect. Not performance. Not ranking. Not competition. We look at history as something lived in the mind, carried in the body, and passed in families. Because the real work of Black history does not end in pride posts. It continues in how Black people learn to see themselves without pyramids. And how they raise the next generation to stand on ground, not on someone else’s back.